Stumbling Steward

Stewardship, stewardship, stewardship.

Everything in my life lately has come back to this one theme.

My definition: using the resources God has blessed me with wisely and as He would want me to.

Merriam-Webster's version: "The conducting, supervising, or managing of something; especially, the careful and responsible management of something entrusted to one's care."

I am stumbling in this area.

I used to think I was doing okay. I budgeted our money well, used my talents to minister as God led. But as God continues to work in my heart, so many areas of poor stewardship have been brought to my attention. Areas that I had never even considered being a steward over. I am sickened and saddened by how far I have fallen and how far I have to go...

Steward of my Boys' minds

They are blank slates. I am responsible for what goes in those precious little minds, what they are exposed to, how it may affect their hearts. It is my job to guard that space and consistently fill it with Truth and knowledge. This is my numero uno job in life right now. I can not even tell you how heavily this weighs on me.

Steward of our space

In the quest to continually simplify our lives, I have discovered we own a lot of unnecessary junk. I never thought of the fact that I need to use our space wisely. Everyone feels so much less stress and can be so much more efficient when the clutter is eliminated. It also means taking better care of the space and stuff we have.

Steward of my time

Definitely my biggest struggle! I am a procrastinator and time waster. My Mom used to say when I was younger that I could waste more time than anyone else she knew...and be perfectly happy doing it. No longer is this acceptable. I have too much to do, too many things I want to do. Plus, I already see this trait in O, my dawdler. My desire is to model being a good time-manager for him. Lord, may I use my time wisely. It is so fleeting.

Steward of my mind

I put a whole lot of reality TV and other mostly pointless things in my mind that probably do not need to be there. This goes hand in hand with time wasting. What should I be filling my mind with? Edifying, my treasure is in heaven type of things. Then I will be better equipped to pour this into my kids.

Steward of my calories

It even comes down to this. I'm telling you: Everything has come down to stewardship for me lately. Every day, there is a certain number of calories that will healthily maintain me. How do I use them? All at once on a half gallon of ice cream and then be hungry the rest of the day? All too often, yes. That is not good at all.

Steward of my Jeremy time

I can never get enough time with my hubby. How do I use the alone time we have each evening? Do I squander it or use it productively?

Steward of my sleep

I stay up way too late...mostly on the computer. When my Guys wake up before 6:00 and I try to squeeze in a work-out and Bible study before that, you can only imagine how crabby I can be when my alarm goes off. Or better yet, how short my patience sometimes gets when we're all crabby and tired in the afternoon. The more sleep I get, the better I am able to handle whatever the day brings.

Anyway, the list could go on and on. I have learned so much about the blessings/responsibilities God has graciously granted me. My desire is to use them wisely, enjoy them thoroughly. It grieves me to realize how badly I have stumbled. By God's grace, I will begin making strides in the right direction.